New friends are so great. You know once you make it past that awkward, will this friendship stick phase and into the there's still so much to get to know about each other phase. (With a security and ease I don't ever remember when dating!)
Last night I was restless. When I get nervous, I wake up in the middle of the night (tonight seems to be a residual excess nervousness from my 2-hour stint last night). See, today (or yesterday?) I had an on-site freelance gig that had me a little nervous. Not the actual nature of the work, but the detaily things. Where do I go when I get there? What's the code for getting into the building after hours? Where do I go when I get there? (Yes, again. About 18 months ago I was trained for the work I was doing today, and that night I got so turned around in this large beautiful building I was completely lost! Something about this place makes me lose my sense of direction, and without my sense of direction, well, I'm lost!) Where will I sit during dinner? Will I be able to keep the participants on schedule after dinner? See how silly I am?
So this morning I decided to work through my pre-gig nerves by talking about them. (I hope you aren't disappointed that this story doesn't lead to a middle-of-the-night phone call to my new friend.) On the phone this morning I told her, "I'm nervous." She said, "About what?!?!" (I hope she wasn't disappointed that this wasn't a "my period's late" kind of nervousness!) So I told her. And she laughed. A nice laugh. A surprised laugh. She said, "That's so funny because you seem so invincible when it comes to these things." (This is evidence of two things: 1. She doesn't know me THAT well yet, but she did get to know me just a little better today. 2. I put up a pretty good front.)
But thanks to her genuine response, I went around today remembering that I just might be invincible.
And, I have finally figured out where to go in this building (basically denying all sense-of-direction instincts), there was a place set for me at dinner, the other employees and freelancers were incredibly warm and helpful to the rookie, and by 8:30 p.m. I was in my car having survived the entire experience.
Now, if only I could figure out why I can't sleep tonight.
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